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By
the time his mother began leaving the cave on hunting expeditions, the cub had
learned well the law that forbade his approaching the entrance. Not only had
this law been forcibly and many times impressed on him by his mother's nose and
paw, but in him the instinct of fear was developing. Never, in his brief
cave-life, had he encountered anything of which to be afraid. Yet fear was in
him. It had come down to him from a remote ancestry through a thousand thousand
lives. It was a heritage he had received directly from One Eye and the
she-wolf; but to them, in turn, it had been passed down through all the
generations of wolves that had gone before. Fear! -- that legacy of the Wild
which no animal may escape nor exchange for pottage.
So
the gray cub knew fear, though he knew not the stuff of which fear was made.
Possibly he accepted it as one of the restrictions of life. For he had already
learned that there were such restrictions. Hunger he had known; and when he
could not appease his hunger he had felt restriction. The hard obstruction of
the cave-wall, the sharp nudge of his mother's nose, the smashing stroke of her
paw, the hunger unappeased of several famines, had borne in upon him that all
was not freedom in the world, that to life there were limitations and
restraints. These limitations and restraints were laws. To be obedient to them
was to escape hurt and make for happiness.
He
did not reason the question out in this man-fashion. He merely classified the
things that hurt and the things that did not hurt. And after such
classification he avoided the things that hurt, the restrictions and
restraints, in order to enjoy the satisfactions and the remunerations of life.
Thus
it was that in obedience to the law laid down by his mother, and in obedience
to the law of that unknown and nameless thing, fear, he kept away from the
mouth of the cave. It remained to him a white wall of light. When his mother
was absent, he slept most of the time, while during the intervals that he was
awake he kept very quiet, suppressing the whimpering cries that tickled in his
throat and strove for noise.
Once,
lying awake, he heard a strange sound in the white wall. He did not know that
it was a wolverine, standing outside, all a-tremble with its own daring, and
cautiously scenting out the contents of the cave. The cub knew only that the
sniff was strange, a something unclassified, therefore unknown and terrible --
for the unknown was one of the chief elements that went into the making of
fear.
The
hair bristled up on the gray cub's back, but it bristled silently. How was he
to know that this thing that sniffed was a thing at which to bristle? It was
not born of any knowledge of his, yet it was the visible expression of the fear
that was in him, and for which, in his own life, there was no accounting. But
fear was accompanied by another instinct -- that of concealment. The cub was in
a frenzy of terror, yet he lay without movement or sound, frozen, petrified
into immobility, to all appearances dead. His mother, coming home, growled as
she smelt the wolverine's track, and bounded into the cave and licked and
nozzled him with undue vehemence of affection. And the cub felt that somehow he
had escaped a great hurt.
But
there were other forces at work in the cub, the greatest of which was growth.
Instinct and law demanded of him obedience. But growth demanded disobedience.
His mother and fear impelled him to keep away from the white wall. Growth is
life, and life is forever destined to make for light. So there was no damming
up the tide of life that was rising within him -- rising with every mouthful of
meat he swallowed, with every breath he drew. In the end, one day, fear and
obedience were swept away by the rush of life, and the cub straddled and
sprawled toward the entrance.
Unlike
any other wall with which he had had experience, this wall seemed to recede
from him as he approached. No hard surface collided with the tender little nose
he thrust out tentatively before him. The substance of the wall seemed as
permeable and yielding as light. And as condition, in his eyes, had the seeming
of form, so he entered into what had been wall to him and bathed in the
substance that composed it.
It was bewildering. He
was sprawling through solidity. And ever the light grew brighter. Fear urged
him to go back, but growth drove him on. Suddenly he found himself at the mouth
of the cave. The wall, inside which he had thought himself, as suddenly leaped
back before him to an immeasurable distance. The light had become painfully
bright. He was dazzled by it. Likewise he was made dizzy by this abrupt and
tremendous extension of space. Automatically, his eyes were adjusting
themselves to the brightness, focussing themselves to meet the increased distance
of objects. At first, the wall had leaped beyond his vision. He now saw it
again; but it had taken upon itself a remarkable remoteness. Also, its
appearance had changed. It was now a variegated wall, composed of the trees
that fringed the stream, the opposing mountain that towered above the trees,
and the sky that out-towered the mountain.
A
great fear came upon him. This was more of the terrible unknown. He crouched
down on the lip of the cave and gazed out on the world. He was very much
afraid. Because it was unknown, it was hostile to him. Therefore the hair stood
up on end along his back and his lips wrinkled weakly in an attempt at a
ferocious and intimidating snarl. Out of his puniness and fright he challenged
and menaced the whole wide world.
Nothing
happened. He continued to gaze, and in his interest he forgot to snarl. Also,
he forgot to be afraid. For the time, fear had been routed by growth, while
growth had assumed the guise of curiosity. He began to notice near objects --
an open portion of the stream that flashed in the sun, the blasted pine tree
that stood at the base of the slope, and the slope itself, that ran right up to
him and ceased two feet beneath the lip of the cave on which he crouched.
Now
the gray cub had lived all his days on a level floor. He had never experienced
the hurt of a fall. He did not know what a fall was. So he stepped boldly out
upon the air. His hind-legs still rested on the cave-lip, so he fell forward
head downward. The earth struck him a harsh blow on the nose that made him
yelp. Then he began rolling down the slope, over and over. He was in a panic of
terror. The unknown had caught him at last. It had gripped savagely hold of him
and was about to wreak upon him some terrific hurt. Growth was now routed by fear,
and he ki-yi'd like any frightened puppy. .
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The
unknown bore him on he knew not to what frightful hurt, and he yelped and
ki-yi'd unceasingly. This was a different proposition from crouching in frozen
fear while the unknown lurked just alongside. Now the unknown had caught tight
hold of him. Silence would do no good. Besides, it was not fear, but terror,
that convulsed him.
But
the slope grew more gradual, and its base was grass-covered. Here the cub lost
momentum. When at last he came to a stop, he gave one last agonized yelp and
then a long, whimpering wail. Also, and quite as a matter of course, as though
in his life he had already made a thousand toilets, he proceeded to lick away
the dry clay that soiled him.
After
that he sat up and gazed about him, as might the first man of the earth who
landed upon Mars. The cub had broken through the wall of the world, the unknown
had let go its hold of him, and here he was without hurt. But the first man on
Mars would have experienced less unfamiliarity than did he. Without any
antecedent knowledge, without any warning whatever that such existed, he found
himself an explorer in a totally new world.
Now
that the terrible unknown had let go of him, he forgot that the unknown had any
terrors. He was aware only of curiosity in all the things about him. He
inspected the grass beneath him, the moss-berry plant just beyond, and the dead
trunk of the blasted pine that stood on the edge of an open space among the
trees. A squirrel, running around the base of the trunk, came full upon him,
and gave him a great fright. He cowered down and snarled. But the squirrel was
as badly scared. It ran up the tree, and from a point of safety chattered back
savagely.
This
helped the cub's courage, and though the woodpecker he next encountered gave
him a start, he proceeded confidently on his way. Such was his confidence, that
when a moose-bird impudently hopped up to him, he reached out at it with a
playful paw. The result was a sharp peck on the end of his nose that made him
cower down and ki-yi. The noise he made was too much for the moose-bird, who
sought safety in flight.
But
the cub was learning. His misty little mind had already made an unconscious
classification. There were live things and things not alive. Also, he must
watch out for the live things. The things not alive remained always in one
place; but the live things moved about, and there was no telling what they
might do. The thing to expect of them was the unexpected, and for this he must
be prepared.
He
travelled very clumsily. He ran into sticks and things. A twig that he thought
a long way off, would the next instant hit him on the nose or rake along his
ribs. There were inequalities of surface. Sometimes he overstepped and stubbed
his nose. Quite as often he understepped and stubbed his feet. Then there were
the pebbles and stones that turned under him when he trod upon them; and from
them he came to know that the things not alive were not all in the same state
of stable equilibrium as was his cave; also, that small things not alive were
more liable than large things to fall down or turn over. But with every mishap
he was learning. The longer he walked, the better he walked. He was adjusting
himself. He was learning to calculate his own muscular movements, to know his
physical limitations, to measure distances between objects, and between objects
and himself.
His
was the luck of the beginner. Born to be a hunter of meat, (though he did not
know it), he blundered upon meat just outside his own cave-door on his first
foray into the world. It was by sheer blundering that he chanced upon the
shrewdly hidden ptarmigan nest. He fell into it. He had essayed to walk along
the trunk of a fallen pine. The rotten bark gave way under his feet, and with a
despairing yelp he pitched down the rounded descent, smashed through the
leafage and stalks of a small bush, and in the heart of the bush, on the
ground, fetched up amongst seven ptarmigan chicks.
They
made noises, and at first he was frightened at them. Then he perceived that
they were very little, and he became bolder. They moved. He placed his paw on
one, and its movements were accelerated. This was a source of enjoyment to him.
He smelled it. He picked it up in his mouth. It struggled and tickled his
tongue. At the same time he was made aware of a sensation of hunger. His jaws
closed together. There was a crunching of fragile bones, and warm blood ran in
his mouth. The taste of it was good. This was meat, the same as his mother gave
him, only it was alive between his teeth and therefore better. So he ate the
ptarmigan. Nor did he stop till he had devoured the whole brood. Then he licked
his chops in quite the same way his mother did, and began to crawl out of the
bush.
He
encountered a feathered whirlwind. He was confused and blinded by the rush of
it and the beat of angry wings. He hid his head between his paws and yelped.
The blows increased. The mother-ptarmigan was in a fury. Then he became angry.
He rose up, snarling, striking out with his paws. He sank his tiny teeth into
one of the wings and pulled and tugged sturdily. The ptarmigan struggled
against him, showering blows upon him with her free wing. It was his first
battle. He was elated. He forgot all about the unknown. He no longer was afraid
of anything. He was fighting, tearing at a live thing that was striking at him.
Also, this live thing was meat. The lust to kill was on him. He had just
destroyed little live things. He would now destroy a big live thing. He was too
busy and happy to know that he was happy. He was thrilling and exulting in ways
new to him and greater to him than any he had known before.
He
held on to the wing and growled between his tight-clenched teeth. The ptarmigan
dragged him out of the bush. When she turned and tried to drag him back into
the bush's shelter, he pulled her away from it and on into the open. And all
the time she was making outcry and striking with her wing, while feathers were
flying like a snow-fall. The pitch to which he was aroused was tremendous. All
the fighting blood of his breed was up in him and surging through him. This was
living, though he did not know it. He was realizing his own meaning in the
world; he was doing that for which he was made -- killing meat and battling to
kill it. He was justifying his existence, than which life can do no greater;
for life achieves its summit when it does to the utter-most that which it was
equipped to do.
After
a time, the ptarmigan ceased her struggling. He still held her by the wing, and
they lay on the ground and looked at each other. He tried to growl
threateningly, ferociously. She pecked on his nose, which by now, what of
previous adventures, was sore. He winced but held on. She pecked him again and
again. From wincing, he went to whimpering. He tried to back away from her,
oblivious of the fact that by his hold on her he dragged her after him. A rain
of pecks fell on his ill-used nose. The flood of fight ebbed down in him, and,
releasing his prey, he turned tail and scampered off across the open in
inglorious retreat.
He
lay down to rest on the other side of the open, near the edge of the bushes,
his tongue lolling out, his chest heaving and panting, his nose still hurting
him and causing him to continue his whimper. But as he lay there, suddenly
there came to him a feeling as of something terrible impending. The unknown
with all its terrors rushed upon him, and he shrank back instinctively into the
shelter of the bush. As he did so, a draught of air fanned him, and a large,
winged body swept ominously and silently past. A hawk, driving down out of the
blue, had barely missed him. . [Stop reading here (record your
time): 1,437 words = 86,220/tot. seconds = words per min.]
While
he lay in the bush, recovering from this fright and peering fearfully out, the
mother-ptarmigan on the other side of the open space fluttered out of the
ravaged nest. It was because of her loss that she paid no attention to the
winged bolt of the sky. But the cub saw, and it was a warning and a lesson to
him -- the swift downward swoop of the hawk, the short skim of its body just
above the ground, the strike of its talons in the body of the ptarmigan, the
ptarmigan's squawk of agony and fright, and the hawk's rush upward into the
blue, carrying the ptarmigan away with it.
It
was a long time before the cub left his shelter. He had learned much. Live
things were meat. They were good to eat. Also, live things when they were large
enough, could give hurt. It was better to eat small live things like ptarmigan
chicks, and to let alone large live things like ptarmigan hens. Nevertheless he
felt a little prick of ambition, a sneaking desire to have another battle with
that ptarmigan hen -- only the hawk had carried her away. Maybe there were
other ptarmigan hens. He would go and see.
He
came down a shelving bank to the stream. He had never seen water before. The
footing looked good. There were no inequalities of surface. He stepped boldly
out on it; and went down, crying with fear, into the embrace of the unknown. It
was cold, and he gasped, breathing quickly. The water rushed into his lungs
instead of the air that had always accompanied his act of breathing. The
suffocation he experienced was like the pang of death. To him it signified
death. He had no conscious knowledge of death, but like every animal of the
Wild, he possessed the instinct of death. To him it stood as the greatest of
hurts. It was the very essence of the unknown; it was the sum of the terrors of
the unknown, the one culminating and unthinkable catastrophe that could happen
to him, about which he knew nothing and about which he feared everything.
He
came to the surface, and the sweet air rushed into his open mouth. He did not
go down again. Quite as though it had been a long-established custom of his, he
struck out with all his legs and began to swim. The near bank was a yard away;
but he had come up with his back to it, and the first thing his eyes rested
upon was the opposite bank, toward which he immediately began to swim. The
stream was a small one, but in the pool it widened out to a score of feet.
Midway
in the passage, the current picked up the cub and swept him down-stream. He was
caught in the miniature rapid at the bottom of the pool. Here was little chance
for swimming. The quiet water had become suddenly angry. Sometimes he was
under, sometimes on top. At all times he was in violent motion, now being
turned over or around, and again, being smashed against a rock. And with every
rock he struck, he yelped. His progress was a series of yelps, from which might
have been adduced the number of rocks he encountered.
Below the rapid was a
second pool, and here, captured by the eddy, he was gently borne to the bank
and as gently deposited on a bed of gravel. He crawled frantically clear of the
water and lay down. He had learned some more about the world. Water was not
alive. Yet it moved. Also, it looked as solid as the earth, but was without any
solidity at all. His conclusion was that things were not always what they
appeared to be. The cub's fear of the unknown was an inherited distrust, and it
had now been strengthened by experience. Thenceforth, in the nature of things,
he would possess an abiding distrust of appearances. He would have to learn the
reality of a thing before he could put his faith into it.
One
other adventure was destined for him that day. He had recollected that there
was such a thing in the world as his mother. And then there came to him a
feeling that he wanted her more than all the rest of the things in the world.
Not only was his body tired with the adventures it had undergone, but his
little brain was equally tired. In all the days he had lived it had not worked
so hard as on this one day. Furthermore, he was sleepy. So he started out to look
for the cave and his mother, feeling at the same time an overwhelming rush of
loneliness and helplessness.
He
was sprawling along between some bushes, when he heard a sharp, intimidating
cry. There was a flash of yellow before his eyes. He saw a weasel leaping
swiftly away from him. It was a small live thing, and he had no fear. Then,
before him, at his feet, he saw an extremely small live thing, only several
inches long -- a young weasel, that, like himself, had disobediently gone out
adventuring. It tried to retreat before him. He turned it over with his paw. It
made a queer, grating noise. The next moment the flash of yellow reappeared
before his eyes. He heard again the intimidating cry, and at the same instant
received a severe blow on the side of the neck and felt the sharp teeth of the
mother-weasel cut into his flesh.
While
he yelped and ky-yi'd and scrambled backward, he was the mother-weasel leap
upon her young ne and disappear with it into the neighboring thicket. The cut
of her teeth in his neck still hurt, but his feelings were hurt more
grievously, and he sat down and weakly whimpered. This mother-weasel was so
small and so savage! He was yet to learn that for size and weight, the weasel
was the most ferocious, vindictive, and terrible of all the killers of the
Wild. But a portion of this knowledge was quickly to be his.
He
was still whimpering when the mother-weasel reappeared. She did not rush him,
now that her young one was safe. She approached more cautiously, and the cub
had full opportunity to observe her lean, snakelike body, and her head, erect,
eager, and snakelike itself. Her sharp, menacing cry sent the hair bristling
along his back, and he snarled warningly at her. She came closer and closer,
There was a leap, swifter than his unpracticed sight, and the lean, yellow body
disappeared for a moment out of the field of his vision. The next moment she
was at his throat, her teeth buried in his hair and flesh.
At
first he snarled and tried to fight; but he was very young, and this was only his
first day in the world, and his snarl became a whimper, his fight a struggle to
escape. The weasel never relaxed her hold. She hung on, striving to press down
with her teeth to the great vein where his life-blood bubbled. The weasel was a
drinker of blood, and it was ever her preference to drink from the throat of
life itself.
The
gray cub would have died, and there would have been no story to write about
him, had not the she-wolf come bounding through the bushes. The weasel let go
the cub and flashed at the she-wolf's throat, missing, but getting a hold on
the jaw instead. Then she-wolf flirted her head like the snap of a whip,
breaking the weasel's hold and flinging it high in the air. And, still in the
air, the she-wolf's jaws closed on the lean, yellow body, and the weasel knew
death between the crunching teeth.
The
cub experienced another access of affection on the part of his mother. Her joy
at finding him seemed greater even than his joy at being found. She nozzled him
and caressed him and licked the cuts made in him by the weasel's teeth. Then,
between them, mother and cub, they ate the blood-drinker, and after that went
back to the cave and slept. . [Stop
reading here (record your time): 1,366 words = 81,960/tot. seconds = words per
min.]